Listen, we shouldn’t be together anymore.
The words echoed in her head painfully, seeming to throb much harder than the actual pain holding her mind hostage at the moment. She desperately clutched at the sheets holding her to her bed, an uncomfortable empty warmth that didn’t seem to satisfy. She rolled over in hopes of a more comfortable position only to be faced with a pillow beside her own, empty, the sheets on that side of the bed completely untouched. Her pillow seemed hot and her face sticky from the dried tears, her only relief the soft breeze rolling in from the open window. Another round of hot tears formed against her waterline before spilling over and sending another warm streak down \her temples. Her thoughts ranged from love to betrayal to anger and back to love all over again. Then, self-hatred.
Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes. All hers. All her fault.
Failed relationship. Broken everything.
The emotional pain rocked her body as she began to sob uncontrollably, her chest heaves lulling her into an uncomfortable sleep.
4:50AM. She began to stir to the heavy vibrations woke her, a dim blue glow softly illuminated her bedroom. Squinting and weary, she reached over and coiled her fingers over her cellphone and sleepily read the onscreen notifications.
4 Missed Calls
2 New Voicemails
1 Unread Text: 2:35AM
Hey, I’m sorry about what I said earlier tonight. You’re probably asleep already… I didn’t want to wake you. Please forgive me. Please take me back. Call me when you wake up in the morning, okay? I love you. -N
A jolt of alleviation with a mixture of euphoria and quiescence washed over her before puffy-eyed exhaustion from dried tears blanked her mind and sent her into a more peaceful sleep.
6:47AM. Suddenly, completely awake and aware, she awoke in a panicked excitement and reached over and grabbed her cellphone.
Her fingers shook as she unlocked the screen and navigated her way into her message inbox.
No available messages to display.
Confused, she checked her call records.
No missed calls.
The lack of sleep began to take over her body now as it registered the present events. No one called last night. There were never any existing voicemails with messages of reconsideration, regret, or intentions of fixing things. There was never a text.
All senses of hope seemed to shatter just her heart broke all over again.
It was all just a dream.
posted by caseybee
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